One young seminarian on a mission of creative hope and authentic faith. "Christians live by the promise of God and thus in creative hope" (Daniel Migliore)

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Post-Hurricane

I live in Jersey and have for two full years. This past weekend was the first hurricane watch I have been through. I was stuck inside for three days more or less, although yesterday I walked to the grocery store. Then today I got up, put on jeans for the first time in months, and went to class. I got cold and put on my hoodie. Sometime, somehow it's that time between summer and fall when you can be freezing one minute and baking the next. The fall semester books are in at the bookstore, and in two and a half weeks school starts. My summer reading list is... no smaller. Thanks, Hebrew class.
Yeah, I got all reflect-y when I was stuck inside.

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Expectations

I recently heard a friend telling a story about a friend if theirs who decided he didn't want to take other people's word about what was in the Bible. Though not a traditionally faithful person he read through the entire Bible then told my friend, "It's nothing like I expected! There's so much sex and stuff!"
My expectations often ruin experiences for me. I get upset when something isn't like I expected instead of enjoying what's happening as what it is. In the fourth week of summer language many people are saying that seminary and summer language is nothing like they expected. Some are relieved, some are upset, and some are confused. I'm enjoying Hebrew a lot more than Greek because my expectations have been adjusted and because I have a group of friends already. We can't let our expectations hold us back from experiencing, and we can't let other's expectations weigh us down. Following Christ is a marathon, not a sprint. You don't always know what's around the next corner or when the next water station is coming up. We can worry and stress over how we expected the race to go or we can meet the new challenges as they arise. There's always time to put off worrying.
Dietrich Bonhoeffer in his book The Cost of Discipleship spends a lot of time talking about "costly grace." God's grace is a very complicated thing, but we as humans respond through faith and action. Cheap grace is grace without obedience to God; costly grace is the kind of grace that transforms our lives, our actions, and our words. Obedience has a negative connotation, but it's an act of free will. Transformation is a process. It takes time. Obedience to many at seminary is the act of going to seminary to empower them for lifelong ministry. We expect certain things. We're the "good ones." We're the older brother diligently working the fields who gets angry when our Parent shows great love and grace to that prodigal sibling. Going to seminary is one long lesson in humility. We have the honor to work closely with our Parent. The work is hard. We expect something for our hard work.
Don't we?
We expect the good grades, the financially stable job, the relationship that doesn't need work. Well, maybe some of us expect those things.
God has made some big promises. Do our expectations match those promises? Did God promise I would receive good grades when I decided to live a life of discipleship? No. Is the path always straight? No. Are we blessed by a community who supports and uplifts us? Yes.
Expect God. It's a lot less stressful that way.